The Pundamaniac is desperate to visit Fenway Park in Boston to see the Boston Red Sox. Therefore, I entered a contest with the following:
Why should I win this contest? Let me tell you my story (I hope I won’t Boggs you down in the details). I remember the good old days, when I’d watch the McGuire Sisters on TV, listed to Connie Francis and Tony Bennett records, read plays penned by the famous Bard and travel to exotic places like Okajima, Japan or the Magadan Islands. Recently, however, I developed Cronin’s disease and it seems I Drew the short end of the stick with my luck. To be quite Francona with you, I recently met a woman who’s a real diamond in the rough, but I can’t get to first base with her. She’s quite a Foxx, a Pesky lady who’s on the ball and who lives a short stop away from me. Being a Doerr and a Wheeler-dealer, I decided to roll the Dice-K and pitch her on the idea of dating me. She seemed to have a heart of Clay because she balked at first and said I was too Young. We finally went out for some Lester’s smoked meat, Campbell’s Soup and pasta with Marinaro sauce and saw the movie All That Yaz; but it was clear that she was out to either torment Ortiz me. We talked about environmental issues but she said I was boring and called me a Green Monster. She said I was a son-of-a-Mitch and I bore the Brunt of her jokes the rest of the evening. She called me too Fisky, didn’t like my point of Bews and said that I had a Lackey of confidence. Thus, you see why I need to win this contest – she has Lefty me in the dark and I need my sense of Manny-hood back and I need to exorcise my Damons. Good luck to the Habs in the Yawkey playoffs!
Will the Pundamaniac ever make it to Fenway Park in Boston??????????????????