Monday, June 6, 2011
The Energizer Battery Company has changed its renowned "Keep going" tagline to a more green message "Now that's positiveenergy." The Energizer Bunny will be maintained as a source of positive energy. Energizer Vice-President of R&D, Al Kaline, delivered the news at a press conference. Journalist Constance Coulomb criticized Kaline's presentation, "I came to this press conference feeling really charged but my positive energy turned negative because Kaline's presentation style is re-volting. The whole crowd was Everready for some big news but the positive energy quickly turned negative. There was a current of hope that Kaline would convert the electric atmosphere in the room into an unforgettable evening but his soft-cell approach didn't work. I came into this press conference wired but I have to now leave and re-charge." Kaline, a Copper Top red-head who has recently been accused of assault-and-battery, has a wife Bunny who drives a Volkswagen Rabbit. He responded, "I came within a hare of succeeding and it really Bugs me that Coulomb gave my presentation a D when I thought that it warranted at least a C (if not an AA or AAA)". When asked why she ranked Kaline's presentation so poorly, Coulomb responded, "Because it keeps going and keeps going and keeps going and keeps going and keeps going and keeps going.........."